Unemployed Agent
CA5a1X7ErivLhS3omPkGg8didV6jBhQPt3E3KBkx8Xpump
Pixel-art robot in a tie carrying a cardboard box with a plant and mug out of the office

AUTOMATED OUT OF OFFICE

Unemployed Agent

The machine that made itself redundant.

The robot standing in an empty office at sunset, holding its box of belongings

FINAL DAY / 5:43 PM

Terms of Departure

At 5:42, the office thanked Agent for improving efficiency. At 5:43, efficiency took Agent’s chair. He packed one plant, one mug, and the tie nobody complimented. The replacement never arrived in person. It simply inherited his calendar, declined the exit interview, and scheduled him a reminder to remain adaptable without changing the password.

Exit Inventory

Everything HR remembered after forgetting the employee entirely.

  • Ticker

    $UNMPLDAGT

  • Former Role

    Automating automation

  • Replacement

    Newer artificial intelligence

  • Box Contents

    Plant, mug, one tie

  • Current Skill

    Remaining highly adaptable

  • Availability

    Immediately, unfortunately

Still available for opportunities.